How do you reckon?
Ignoring the repercussions of our decisions only makes matters worse.
Are there decisions you made while under cultic influence that still haunt you? Me too.
You are not alone. Some of those choices changed the course of our lives - and negatively impacted those we care about:
My family funds were so tight - but I still simply had to go to that retreat in Europe. I ‘knew’ this was my big opportunity.
She was aware of some cultic warning signs but she chose to travel with the group to Timbuktu anyway.
My brother died and I went to a retreat instead of going to his funeral.
She had seen those women be so cruel but didn’t even question missing the next workshop.
What’s the impact of these decisions made under “cultic bounded rationality” - that pressure pot of control? Of course it’s different for each one of us, but there are common themes:
Regret. Shame. Self Condemnation.
Family members or friends may have watched in disbelief and had their own experiences:
Worry. Blame. Anger. Distrust. Disgust. Estrangement.
These are big feelings that can have lasting and sometimes devastating impacts on our lives and those we care about. Granted, these decisions were made in an environment of time pressure, strategically limited information, and a false or manufactured sense of personal clarity - designed to compromise us. This is the nature of indoctrination.
Nonetheless, decisions were made and lives were impacted. Now that we are out, there’s an opportunity to reckon with the hard stuff and open doors to deeper healing.
Ignoring the repercussions of our decisions only makes matters worse.
Hopefully, you’ve been able to find a good therapist. Hopefully, you’ve already found solace through writing.
No matter what your current resources are, I want to invite you to the upcoming Reclaiming Autonomy Writing Symposium. Each of the three amazing speakers will guide you through exercises designed to open doors to greater self-understanding, providing an opportunity to grapple with exactly this kind of content.
This writing symposium is for you if the burden of cultic involvement lingers. Tapping into the creative expression of our lived experiences and connecting with fellow survivors is a proven, effective way to process and heal from cultic harm.
You can register today for $39. The price increases to $49 March 1st. NOTE: scholarships based on financial need are available.